Mormons

By Amy Choate-Nielsen

Deseret News
Published: Sunday, Jan. 15, 2012 7:00 p.m. MST

David Letterman knows how to get a laugh.Like most comics, he riffs on the day’s news, deadpans the camera and revels in audacity.”Oh, did you hear about this?” the host of CBS’ Late Show with David Letterman asked his audience recently. “A campaign staffer on the Newt Gingrich campaign was fired because he was making negative comments about Mormons. I thought, now, wait a minute — isn’t Newt in favor of multiple wives?”
Laughter rumbled from the audience followed by applause. The polygamy punch line is a familiar one when it comes to poking fun at Mormons — as though Mormons and polygamy are synonymous in mainstream media. Ironically, the practice that’s most linked to Mormons is a practice most Mormons oppose, according to a groundbreaking new study of Mormons in America released Thursday by the Pew Research Center‘s Forum on Religion and Public Life.

According to the study, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints unequivocally reject polygamy — only 2 percent said the practice is morally acceptable — evidence of a yawning gap in what Mormons believe and how they are perceived. Mormons’ opinions are overwhelmingly conservative, the study shows, but in many ways, their views are also surprising — especially when it comes to opinions on moral issues, divorce, homosexuality and polygamy. Read the rest of this entry »

As the “Mormon moment” extends into 2012, the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life today released a groundbreaking new survey, the first ever published by a non-LDS research organization to focus exclusively on members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and their beliefs, values, perceptions and political preferences.

Entitled “Mormons in America: Certain in Their Beliefs, Uncertain of Their Place in Society,” the survey was conducted between Oct. 25 and Nov. 16, 2011 among a national sample of 1,019 respondents who identified themselves as Mormons. The results validate a number of long-held stereotypes (most American Mormons are white, well-educated, politically conservative and religiously observant) while providing a few interesting surprises (care for the poor and needy is high on the list of LDS priorities, while drinking coffee and watching R-rated movies aren’t as taboo among the rank and file as you might think).

“While this survey comes amid a contentious election campaign, it is not solely or even chiefly about politics,” said Luis Lugo, Pew Research Center director, in the published survey’s preface. “Rather, we hope that it will contribute to a broader public understanding of Mormons and Mormonism at a time of great interest in both.”

For example, in one very interesting section of the new survey, respondents were asked several questions about what is essential to being a good Mormon. According to the survey, 80 percent said “believing Joseph Smith saw God the Father and Jesus Christ” is essential to being a good Mormon, 73 percent said “working to help the poor,” 51 percent said “regular Family Home Evenings,” 49 percent said “not drinking coffee and tea” and 32 percent said “not watching R-rated movies. Read the rest of this entry »

Imagine moving to a new city where you don’t know anyone and discovering four people have been asked to look after you-showing you how to find things, making sure you’re invited to the important and fun things that are happening, checking to see if you need any help with anything.

This is how it is for Mormons. Each member of the church is assigned a pair of home teachers, and each woman also receives two visiting teachers as well. This special program makes sure everyone is looked after, even if their congregation is very large. The bishop (similar to a pastor) is a volunteer, and so can’t get to everyone. This program is designed to help.

Home teachers are always men, since they are members of the priesthood. A young man is first invited to become a home teacher at the age of fourteen, paired with an adult, usually his father. In ideal situations, each family is assigned two home teachers, who visit the home together, meeting with the entire family. They teach a brief spiritual lesson on an assigned topic unless the family has a special request for a particular topic. They also spend time getting to know the family, particularly the husband, building a relationship of trust so the family will feel safe turning to them in times of need.

When a Mormon faces a crisis or need, he turns first to his home teachers, whether it’s for help moving, or something more serious, such as unemployment. The home teachers do what they can for the family, and refer the problem to their leaders when it is more than they can or should take on themselves. Being a father is an overwhelming experience and it is comforting to know where you can turn for help.

Women receive additional connections through their two visiting teachers. All visiting teachers are at least eighteen years old, since they must be members of the Relief Society, the adult women’s auxiliary. Like the men, they visit the home monthly, but only visit the adult women in the home. They work to build a true friendship with the women they visit, and stay alert to signs the woman may need a meal brought in during illness, a plate of cookies on a bad day, or even a babysitter for a doctor’s appointment. It’s considered an honor to be able to serve those women the visiting teachers visit.

This program actually creates a network of relationships, since the home and visiting teachers usually have two to four families they see, including those who are not active, and therefore not participating as home or visiting teachers. As a result, a women will develop a friendship with her own two visiting teachers, and as many as four other women she herself visits, and in addition, builds a friendship with her visiting teaching companion-the person she visits with. For a person who is new, this is an instantly large network of friends.

The program also benefits the elderly or disabled who can’t leave their homes and may not have family nearby. It creates a safety net, as home and visiting teachers often check on these people daily to be sure they are okay. In addition to safety, they have friends who come to see them often, which helps to stem the loneliness of being unable to leave home.

Home and visiting teaching is an inspired program which brings comfort, safety and connectability to a congregation with many members.

Although not the only religious group opposing same-gender marriage, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) has received a great deal of attention concerning their active opposition to marriages for same gender couples. This website seeks to help people understand the Church’s stand on this subject, and on marriage in general.

Marriage was ordained by God from the very beginning of time. He created two people, a man named Adam and a woman named Eve. They were joined together by Him, and according to God’s Plan of Salvation, their union was meant to last through the eternities, and not just for their mortal lives. They were told to begin a family and raise their children together. From the first days of the earth, God set the pattern for family life—a man and a woman, and, if possible, children. This basic family structure creates an appropriate foundation for all other units of society and for an eternal life.

Mormons teach that gender is an essential part of who we are, and that it was determined long before birth. However, they do not teach that having homosexual inclinations is a sin. Only the practice of homosexuality is a sin. Feelings are not sinful; practice of inappropriate feelings can be.

Members of the Church with homosexual inclinations, who choose not to act on them or advocate for the acceptance of such actions, can be members of the Church in full standing. They may hold any role in the Church that may be held by any other unmarried person of his or her gender, which means that most positions are open to them.

The Church teaches its members to love and to respect those with homosexual inclinations, just as they do anyone else, and make it clear that mistreatment is not tolerated. However, this does not mean they feel inappropriate behavior must be condoned. Churches are, by nature, in the business of defining right and wrong. If they refuse to do so, to remind people of God’s teachings on any given moral subject, and to stand for something, they have no real reason to exist.

With this in mind, the Mormons, as representatives of God, must take a firm stand on anything that affects the sanctity and well-being of the family, one of God’s most sacred creations. This site will help you understand more about this eternally critical subject.

In order to entirely understand why Mormons object to changing the legal definition of marriage, one must understand a number of critical doctrines of the Church. With a complete understanding of these doctrines, while you might still disagree, you will better be able to understand why we feel obligated to fight for the traditional family. Please follow the following path of articles to help you build a foundation for your study.

Child of God—Mormons know that what you consider to be your defining characteristic has a powerful impact on your life. Mormons with homosexual feelings do not consider same gender attraction to be what defines them. They consider the primary defining factor to be that they are children of God.

Gender was determined prior to birth. What this means to Mormons struggling with same-gender attraction.

Gay Mormons: A summary of what the Church believes about homosexuality

Attitude Toward Trials

Mormons and Marriage: How Mormons view marriage and why they don’t want the legal definition of marriage changed.

Mormons and the Same Sex Marriage Battle

Can Churches Participate in the Political Process?

Is Polygamy a Valid Gay Marriage Argument?

The remaining articles on the site are about basic beliefs of Mormons, for those who want to know more, and may be read in any order.

Bruce C. Hafen on Same-Gender Attraction

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) has been an active participant in the legal battle over gay marriages. What exactly are they trying to achieve in their work in this area?

It’s important to understand they are not trying to ban homosexual behavior, which is best handled through spiritual and moral training. Nor are they focusing on other legal rights for people with homosexual tendencies.

“The Church does not object to rights (already established in California) regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights, so long as these do not infringe on the integrity of the family or the constitutional rights of churches and their adherents to administer and practice their religion free from government interference.” (The Divine Institution of Marriage)

The entire focus of the Church’s efforts is to protect the definition of marriage and make sure that as a result of laws passed, the free practice of religion is not endangered. There are consequences to changing the definition of marriage that can have far-reaching effects on religions and on family rights.

For instance, making same-gender marriage legal will cause schools to be required to teach this type of marriage as normal and acceptable. We’ve already seen, in some states, that the schools are allowed to do this without parental warning or approval, and can even require children to bring such materials into the home, violating the rights of parents to control the morality of items in their own homes. Although opponants have denied this, if homosexual marriages are legal, schools would have no choice but to include them in discussions of marriage. Any current laws preventing this would certainly be challenged.

There have been challenges to the free practice of religion or freedom of speech in this movement. Some feel that any opposition to the proposed laws constitute hate speech and should be forbidden. This violates laws protecting both religion and speech, and create a double standard, since those declaring it hate speech believe they themselves can employ similar language in opposing those who support traditional marriage. Such a double standard endangers democracy for everyone, since the tide could change at any time, with the prohibitions placed on the opposing party.

When the issue has been put to a vote, we’ve seen clearly that Americans are not interested in redefining marriage. Changes to marriage laws generally come through the courts-the choice of a small number of people who choose to override democracy and the morality of the American people. This is a dangerous game to play, and all have an interest in ensuring we don’t have our country overtaken by judges who bypass the system of democracy so carefully crafted at our nation’s founding.

The Mormon Church upholds the civil rights of all citizens.  The Church has even said it would not fight civil unions between gays.  It stops short of approving marriage, since the Lord has proclaimed the institution to be sacred and has promised mankind with destruction should the institution of marriage be corrupted by any sort of movement, idea, or change that is against His will.  Recently, laws were proposed in Utah upholding gay civil rights.  Click here to read about the Church’s stance.

In the Bible, we read of several situations where people, even prophets, had more than one wife. Abraham (Genesis 16), David (2 Samuel 2), and Jacob (Genesis 29) are three examples. The Lord even gave instructions for the caring of multiple wives in some Bible verses. However, in others, he specifically instructed his people not to take multiple wives. There were times when God allowed it to serve a specific purpose, and other times when he did not allow it, because it wasn’t needed at that time. It is a principle to be instituted only under direct instruction from God.

This is not the case with homosexuality. Nowhere in the Bible does God give his blessing to homosexual behavior, and He very specifically condemns such behaviors. This makes it clear there can be no connection between the two. When the Mormons allowed polygamy, it was for a very brief time when God ordained it, presumably to bring into the world enough children to ensure the Church’s survival during the times it was legal to murder Mormons. God, knowing everything, knew polygamy would eventually be outlawed, and being able to control the world to meet the needs of the great plan He created, timed everything so the goals would be accomplished before the Church was forced to abandon it.

It should be noted that they did abandon it, more than one hundred years ago. Those who practice polygamy today are not Mormons, since practicing polygamy is punished by excommunication from the Church.  One hundred years ago is a very long time and is hardly a logical argument for today. To say that because a people practiced polygamy a century ago means they have to support gay marriage today would create serious problems if people were held to that argument. Let’s look at political parties, as an example.

In 1840, the Democratic Party opposed government intervention in the spread of slavery. Were we to force them to hold to their original platform, not only would they support slavery, but they would also have to support small, local government with limited power. These last items are currently the territory of the Republicans. So, just as they expect America to accept that they’ve made changes in their organization over the years, they must also accept that religions also make changes over the years. In the case of the Mormons, change comes about through revelation, but whether the choices are made by revelation or human decision, the point is that we don’t hold people, groups, political parties, nations, or religions to what they did one hundred years ago, particularly when the arguments are completely unrelated.  Nor would we want to do this, unless we prefer we all live in primitive conditions without the benefits of modern knowledge and culture.

While the Mormons make their choices based on revelation, and governments make theirs based on political need, the right to make choices—and to live differently today than we did yesterday—is a right that comes with democracy. At a national level, the source of the decision isn’t what’s important. It entirely comes down to what kind of country Americans want to live in. Democracy allows us that freedom, and Mormons, like many other Americans, believe in Democracy and the right of and ability of Americans to make those choices.

One reason members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, sometimes called Mormons, are able to have such a close and personal relationship with God is because they believe in prayer. Not only do they believe they can talk with God anytime they choose and about anything at all, but they also believe He will respond to them. God doesn’t always say yes to our requests, but He always answers, in whatever way is best. He knows us so well He has our entire eternal plan in His heart, and His answers to our pleas are based on knowing what we need. While we may not always understand the reason for the answer, we can trust Him to make the best choices.

Mormons prayer often. They traditionally hold personal prayers every morning and evening, and anytime in-between they feel a desire to do so. In addition, they pray before each meal. Many pray before leaving their homes, and most families also have prayers before important events in their lives. Of course, they also pray for comfort and guidance in times of need.

Their prayers are personal. Except for a very few specific prayers, they are not memorized and recited prayers. Rather, they are given from the heart of the person praying. They follow a general pattern:

1. Address Heavenly Father by name. Most often, they begin with “Dear Heavenly Father “ or “Our Beloved Father in Heaven,” or something similar.
2. Express deep gratitude for blessings. It’s important each day to stop and remember what God has done for us and the role He plays in our lives. As we do so, we offer thanks for those things.
3. Request those things we need. God always hears our pleas for help. However, He has a longer view of our lives, and a better understanding of our needs, so at times, He may know we are asking for something that, in the long run, would not benefit us. In these cases, He may answer no, or not yet, but He always answers, and always in the way that is best for us. In this portion of our prayers, we also pray for others whose needs we are aware of. Prayer can be one of our greatest acts of service and miracles have happened when people pray for others.
4. Close in the name of Jesus Christ, and end with Amen. We pray to God through Jesus.
5. Pause and listen for answers and feel the Spirit surrounding us. 

It’s important, as we ask God for help, that we not ask Him to do for us what we could do for ourselves. God, as a perfect parent, knows it is not good to do everything for us. We must pray for help and then do all that’s in our power to bring about the changes ourselves. He then makes up the difference. For instance, if we pray for a neighbor who is hungry, God would expect us to get off our knees and bring some groceries to that neighbor. While we may not be able to give them all the food they need, we must do our part and then trust God to do that which is beyond our abilities. In the same way, if we needed a job, we couldn’t pray for one and then sit back and watch television until one appeared. We’d need to search for work, talk to people, and send out our resumes so God has a way to make the right employer notice us. We must always do our part.

When we do our part, God then does His.

The most important prayer a person can offer is the one in which He finds out which church God wants Him to join. This is essential to anyone who loves God, wants to please Him, and wants to know God’s truth. Only God’s answer can be trusted completely.

To learn which church to join, a seeker should first begin studying the options and be prepared to make some informed choices. By praying for inspiration, the seeker will be able to recognize the spirit’s guidance in the search. When one finds a potential choice, he or she can pray to know if it’s true. A peaceful, warm feeling is God’s way of telling us we have made the right choice. Satan can never bring a feeling of peace. God is able to do anything at all, and that means He can answer prayers in a way that tells us it is indeed Him giving us our answer.

Asking for guidance brings with it the responsibility to follow through. If we ask God for answers, we must then do what He tells us to do. Throughout our lives, as we continue to seek God’s guidance in our lives, we will often find answers that don’t seem to match our personal desires. As we continue to follow God’s choices instead of our own, our faith grows. We begin to understand the wisdom of following His guidance and trusting Him to know what we don’t know.